Hello there, just thought I would write for a few minutes since I have so much on my mind. Things have been great and horrible at the same time.

Amazing
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1. Did amazing in a runway show for Rare magazine in Austin
2. Going to L.A. in 2 days for fun shoots
3. My one year anniversary is coming up on the 8th
4. I have an amazing idea for a great new online company
5. I got to go to a prom with Jason and had a super fun time

Horrible
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1. My grandmother is sick cancer
2. My father is sick with cancer
3. One of my best friend's has had a bad bout with luck latley and things aren't going well for him at the moment
4. I want to move out of this town
5. I'm nervous about L.A.
6. My car insurance is going up
7. I'm always tired but can't sleep
8. I just feel really over welmed

I know that everything will be ok, but I hate feeling helpless and vulnerable. I am ready to get something up and running-- sign with an agency or get my company started...OR BOTH! I need inspiration and there really isn't any in san angelo and I hate it so much. I am really looking forward to laying on the beach in all my glorious whiteness in Cali and just relaxing.... coated in a layer of SPF 3000 I will just let everything go.... I haven't ever seen the ocean so I am looking forward to it.
I'm also nervous about my shoots.... It's something I can't help really... I haven't ever met a photographer that hasn't liked me but I am always worried about it cause I really don't look like a model when you meet me. I look like a normal 17 year old girl until I get through hair and makeup and sit infront of that camera. I just have bad anxiety.
Work is still work, the same place it has been for the past 3 or 4 years, just a few new faces and rules. Crossin' my fingers that I will bank thursday and friday for L.A.
If anyone reads this please pray for my grandmother and my daddy. Also a little boy named Joshua who is 4 years old and has auto immune disease. I am blessed dailey to have my health...I should take better care of myself.
xoxox
jeska